|
|
21 Mar - 13:20 The
Trevitt-Dunne Post Exam Plan 1)
London, 'The Lion King', The Comedy Store, Louis (food-general) Benito 'Wise Guy' Jones 20 Mar - 15:46 "Repetition," he said "is the biggest killer amongst youth these days." And by god, I believed the guy. His weaselly eyes bore into my head from across the sofa, his head lolled to the side as though he were some sort of marionette sent to haunt me with his awful insights. I looked across the room through the haze. A man with an afro and an unfeasibly large head was trying to get intimate with a small, familiar-looking girl. Not three feet from me sat an equally ill-proportioned guy with an eyebrow ring and a vacant grin which told me everything and nothing I needed to know. He also looked vaguely familiar, like someone I'd known in another place at another time, but in a way that unsettled me greatly. Clearly, I was in the wrong place. There was little to be done about any of it, though. All the people at the party who I actually knew well enough to feel at ease had either left or gone to bed. All that was left was me and this bunch of misfits, outcast from society and weighing on my mental clarity more with every passing second. I was even unsure as to whether seconds were passing. I decided to go turtle, and hope that the drugs would see me though the night. With any luck the marionette was passed out by now, and Eyebrow Ring was clearly beyond communication. The boy and girl in the corner were impervious to outside influence. It was just me. My watch read 2:30am. I would need a can of Lech and another spliff just to get through the next 30 minutes. I straightened up and stumbled out towards the kitchen. That's an extract from the forthcoming Fear and Loathing in Leamington Spa, which I intend to serialise on these pages as and when they occur to me. Stay tuned in and dropped out people. - Gonzo Jones 16 Mar - 14:53 ‘His head swelled to three times Its size’, said The Sun. ‘Like the Elephant Man’, claimed The Star. ‘It looked like their heads were going to explode’, the BBC. This, of course, no reference to any over-keen eggheads you might know or a member of the Ellis-Bextor family, but rather to the more tragic story relating to the three twenty-somethings who opted to earn a bit of cash on the side through medical testing this week. It’s a subject which has got me thinking… I’ve done some research and found that you can earn big money – up to a grand for a few weeks sat around, watching DVDs and oh, did I mention, swallowing or being injected with drugs not previously tested on human being? You could, of course, equally earn a grand over the course of a few weeks going via slightly more ‘normal’ channels – namely, working – but that’s a bit easy isn’t it? So here’s the moral maze for you this week – you need ‘volunteers’ like these to test x, y or TGN1412 before they’re fit for human consumption, but who the hell would play the Russian Roulette of the medical world – and is a money incentive right? Elsewhere, does this case not say something about the inefficiency of animal testing? Strange isn’t it, that the reactions of a guinea pig to this drug were different…to a 15 stone man. No shit Sherlock. Anyway, few stories of my own to tell over the past ten days hence why I’ve had to dive into the annals of the news. I’m off to sign-up for some ‘easy money’ seeing what effect living in a 2’x2’ hutch will have on my back – they’ve tested it on guinea pigs , apparently it’s fine… - The Elephant Man 15 Mar - 17:23 Well, Shakespeare is officially out of the way, and the end of term properly celebrated. We know we've been neglecting you lovely people, but all that's over, tuneage on the way. We're hitting the centre a bit later this evening to churn something out. Got big plans. Big big plans. Honest. You'll love it. There, relevant bit out of the way first for once. In other news, the last few days have been a bit of a blurry smudgy mess. After handing in 3000 Shakey words on Monday, there was much sleeping and gnashing of teeth. Last night was supposed to be the big English and French social in Leam, but turned into a general night out. Sugar's always better than you remember it being, and this was no exception. The Vod Bulls shot down and the music was pretty good - that Pendulum album is great all the way through. Maybe we should contemplate a cover of Slam.... Upshot is, back to Cat and Elea's for smoke and sleep, then half a day watching daytime TV - makes me realise how little I miss television. Gonna have to make arrangements for the World Cup and the Snooker World Championships though. Right, I'm listening to Captain Beefheart on the Big Lebowski Soundtrack, and it's good stuff. Time for a bit of Vice City before practice. I'll let you know how it all goes. Over and out. - Ben 'Burnt Out and Broke' Jones 10 Mar - 21:30 Well, the Mad March Party was everything it promised and more - great visuals (for the union), great tunes, great company, great night all round. We didn't make the last Hagrid class of the year this morning at 10 (quel dommage...) or the lecture after it, but we dragged ourselves to the modernism seminar at 3 somehow, and then up to the Graduate for an end-of-term drink and some chips - a nice afternoon all round. Right now Andy's headed out to Leamington for some food then Carl's birthday party. I'm going to be recovering for a while yet, though four hours of GTA Vice City have put me on the right track. Relevant bit? 'Fraid not, this is just a rambling post cos I'm bored. Night all. - Ben 9 Mar - 13:54 Dear me, whose idea was last night? We watched the football in Rootes' bar (£1 a pint at half time - bad news) then decamped to the Graduate for a quiet wind-down drink, all very nice. By that point we were pretty rowdy, and for some reason, when Andy said Score was a good idea, I completely agreed. Before we knew it we were in the Union amongst a bunch of pissed-up first year rugby players and scantily-clad ladies of questionable repute, necking double vodkas at Grumpy John's bar. Things rapidly escalated, and I can't really remember us getting thrown at and stumbling home. The strange thing is, I don't think we cooked any of Sophia's chips when we got in.... What we did do was have a lengthy chat (shouting match) on the pros and cons of university life over tins of Kronenbourg ending around 3.30 in the am. Needless to say we both woke up pretty groggy, though Andy had it harder with a seminar early in the day. I'll pay tonight though, when James and co come round for a drink before we head to the Mad March Party. The very idea brings the taste of Grolsch to the back of my mouth.... I'll let you know how it goes, I know you're captivated. - Ben 6 Mar - 19:28 Dressing room requirements? Are 77 virgins and a cask of Dom Perignon really that unreasonable? Well never mind. This Big Day Out thing seems a bit nebulous to me. A bit pie in the sky, as are most of Dunney's grand schemes. Lord Rootes anyone? He and J Bizzle were just going to embezzle this poor old fool out of a few grand and waltz off to the Caribbean for a month or two - how far did that get them? Exactly. Still, I'm up for anything - with any luck whoever's organising it will be of sounder mind. Relevant bit: the new xaphoon really does sound good, it's just these bloody essays we're stuck with. It's a loud bit of kit too. Anyone not at uni reading this should know that term ends this Friday, and we'll start on some serious rehearsing and recording - a couple of tunes a week is our aim. And we have some truly exciting stuff lined up. Keep the suggestions rolling, we promise to consider every single one for at least a few seconds. Even yours, Kenny. Speaking of which, this Thursday, the Union. Last big night of the term. Gives me an idea, maybe we could pull off Set You Free by N-Trance.... - Ben 6 Mar - 00:31 Well, it’s been an eventful couple of weeks this end post speed-dating - the actual results of which I have been told I can’t go into here, according to my sister, on ‘ethical grounds’. Big news as of Friday is that Ben and I welcome a new recruit into the Ever Felt Lost family in the form of my impressive new, C-Xaphoon and generous birthday present from Siri, Ben, Lola, Jimmy Love and Isabelle. I thank you all from the heart of my bottom. Word-play aside, it really is impressive, loud, and gives me a potential range of not one but two octaves – supposedly making light work of things we’ve struggled with in the past. It comes from Hawaii – as does the uke, so we’re thinking of a take on Hawaii 5-0 for the not too distant. As a side note it’s well worth having a look at the link to some video of the guy making them, quite a character it seems. I say not too distant, but our offerings of said tune have, I’m reliably informed, been mistaken for a take on the Blackadder theme by a certain Chris Larraway eavesdropping on us from downstairs. We’ll let you be the judge on that one soon enough. In other news, we’re being pencilled in to do a set by up-and-coming comedy group Big Day Out – www.bigdayout.net – during their show in the big city of London. Title wise it seems to work very well; Ever Felt Lost? Time for a Big Day Out… but we’re still thrashing it out over fees and Ben’s dressing room requirements. It really is time I hit the hay, I’m a country lad after all. - Andy 3 Mar - 11:27 Well, I'm sitting here wasting time and putting off the load of work that needs doing cos I'm just too excited. Just been to the post room to pick up Waxy's lovely present (tad late, I know), and it's a gorgeous looking little thing. His current bamboo's nice looking, but this proper xaphoon is the real deal, no doubt about it. I've received my orders from the kitchen staff, i.e. no giving of presents until all contributors are assembled and ready, which is no fun at all. One way or another we'll be hearing from the xaphoon tonight.... Maybe we'll even record/photograph/video the first honk. I really am just too good to you lucky people. I've even rearranged the comments page so the newer ones are at the top. Do you know how much work-time I wasted cutting and pasting all that into the right order? Some, that's how much. - Ben 1 Mar - 19:01 Well, it's that time of the year again - Real Ale Week. In a couple of hours we're heading to The Cooler for a few pints of Thrubb's Thripp or Bishop's Penis or whatever nasty brown gunk is featuring this year. Either way I know I'll be feeling ill before very long. Ah well. In more appropriate news, we've been going round It Must Be Love and Take Five - they sound good and okay respectively. Baker Street is interesting, and the sax solo sounds awesome, but the key changes are holding us up at the mo. The arrival of Andy's new xaphoon should help, since we can then switch from D to C within a song. Sounds like nonsense, and no doubt it is, but there you go. Plus there's a guitar solo in there, which might give me a chance to show off instead of that bloody Wax boy.... Oh, and you can now see your comments on the contact page. No excuses for not requesting tunes! Don't worry Kenny, we're not ignoring you, we're considering Louie Louie - chooooooooooooon! All you spammers out there don't bother posting, since it doesn't go directly up, I'm copying and pasting the stuff I see fit to.... Dydd Gwyl Dewi hapus i bawb. Hwyl. -
Ben 'Welsh when it suits him' Jones |
 |
  
|
|
| home | tunes | blogs | contact | gallery | ||||
